Love is openness. When the heart is open, there are no defenses, you are laid bare… Such openness implies total trust in the world. And in my life, I’ve never had problems with such openness. But at first, I was just very lucky: I hardly encountered people who would take advantage of this openness. But times change.
I am still open. I find it easy to fall in love – because I am open. And a couple of times in my life, I met men who were open to me. But men are much more pragmatic. Even when they are open, they don’t forget to assert themselves and keep something for themselves, always taking more than they give…
Today I realized one thing: I simply am not being opened up to. Men don’t open up to me. Don’t trust? No, just don’t want to… Although who could be safer than a person who has been turned inside out so many times… I won’t be able to hurt them. Won’t take advantage. I’ll leave faster, but won’t harm. It’s not about trust…
The essence of the idea that “one always loves, while the other allows themselves to be loved” – is precisely in the phenomenon of openness. When one is open, it’s not necessary to open up in return. You can simply reach out, lying on the warm sand, and pluck coconuts and bananas from the tree branch, while someone open is toiling away, growing tropical plants on rocky soil. You need to be an amazing, strong person to remain as open as the other, equally open without closing up, continuing to trust, continuing to give oneself to Love.
“Love was strong, but, still, pride won…” = I really wanted to open up, so much. But the fear of pain, the fear of being possessed when you leap into this abyss of boiling milk and roses, memories of pain already experienced, fear of disappearing into this pain, makes you close up… Pride is the fear of losing oneself… It’s impossible not to lose oneself, fully opening up to Love. That’s the essence of love – losing oneself as an individual. But not as individuality.
Individuality (spirituality) in Love strengthens, perfects, crystallizes, becomes more transparent. “In my humble understanding,” Love is the most powerful spiritual practice on Earth, one that not every even bold being is capable of daring. True love. Love is self-renunciation, love is self-sacrifice.
Voluntary renunciation of personality with ego, voluntary entry onto the path of rigorous spiritual training, in which the weak perish, and the strong become Gods…
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